I planned to start publishing some musings after launching this publication on Apophenia’s last birthday. But shortly after, I embarked on a new adventure which involved relocating to a new city. So it’s taken a while to get started.
Belief is a tool”, they said. “Nothing is true and everything is permitted”, rings the call of Chaos Magick.
I’ve pondered over the concept of ‘belief’ much since I first read Pete Caroll’s Liber Null in the late 1980’s. And yet still it holds mysteries ripe for opening.
I suspect that’s because the concept of belief does not paint the full picture without discussing it in the context - bringing it into relation with everything it touches on.
Belief seems to act like a projection upon the world. It influences our perception of reality. And we filter the expression of what we call ‘will’ through it. We may be aware of the beliefs we hold. Or they may hide in our shadow, unconsciously held bound up.
All beliefs contain untruth. Beliefs get passed around in bonding rituals at tribal and cultural scales, and are often handed down from parents or ancestors long gone. Rarely do the deepest of beliefs face scrutiny by those that cling to them.
We might do well to consider mindfully what we choose to believe, for our beliefs define the limits of our achievable reality.
At a wild and stormy pagan weekend gathering in the bush lands of New South Wales, Australia in the 1990s, a magickal elder asked me, “So, what do you believe in?” I was new to magickal groups and didn’t have a very good answer, so I just said, a little nervously, “I believe in myself”, not realising that what sounded like an assertion of confidence, rephrased as “I believe in my Self” provides a good basis for doing pretty much anything. The elder laughed deeply as others listened and said “This one will go a long way.”
Beliefs form the deep spells of the unconscious mind that operate far below ordinary conscious awareness. For most, once established, they do not change much over the course of life, much like our values.
Beliefs should not be confused with thoughts. It’s easy to think a thought while deep down believing something entirely different. Just look at the use of affirmations, which rarely sink deep enough to make lasting difference. Affirmations reenforce their own counter-beliefs. Why would one need to repeat the affirmation if they were true? Yet many spiritual seekers invest hours repeating affirmations that deep down they don’t believe in the hope that saying them will make them true. What a mindfuck!
Changing the deepest of beliefs may feel unpleasant, confusing, and even traumatic to the central nervous system - a disturbing experience. It can cause ‘spiritual emergency’, psychotic breaks and breakdowns. And it can give rise to ‘spiritual emergence’ and breakthroughs. So most human nervous systems will naturally resist attempts to dislodge deep belief spells in favour of certainty, predictability and the collective illusion known as sanity, even if those beliefs cause suffering for themselves or others. The origins of deep belief spells usually involve survival of some unpleasant event, made easier to adapt to and move on from by the construction (or adoption of) the belief that traps unresolved emotional energy into defence mechanisms.
Deep belief spells can be so powerful that, over time, they influence the physical structure and appearance of the holder. Austrian psychologist Wilhelm Reich called this ‘character armour’, Causes may seem as innocent as losing a beloved person, pet or home - or as unpleasant as surviving a crash, rape, war, famine or natural disaster. And many are handed down to us by our direct familial ancestors and indirect cultural predecessors.
When we dare to look, we may find many beliefs that at first glance we might be inclined to judge as unwanted. And yet there they are, longing for resolve. Self-hatred, hatred of other, status projection, and most forms of prejudice (pre-judgement) have a basis in the deep spells of belief. Their formulas always include statements, the most viscous and insidious of which involve the use of the words “is”, “am”, “are”, “was”, “were” and all the derivations of the verb “to be”.
Much of modern therapy aims to unravel subconscious belief complexes - to de-armour self. The most effective of them work by bringing awareness to the emotions that bind them in place, then safely releasing them. In my personal experience, breathwork, deep meditation, movement and shaking, psychedelics, singing and walking barefoot in nature have been the most powerful and accessible of these. But each of us has unique history and keys to unlock our own mysteries.
The work of what I’d call ‘deep magick’ dismantles the acquired deep belief-spells, and empowers individuals to safely believe nothing, to permit Kia, True-Self, Universal-Mind, Parusha, Spirit, or whatever you’d like to call your essential spark, to express its own success directly into the world.
Deep magick liberates the mind from the shackles of deep belief spells, so that we can enjoy the ride more. It enables us to sit at the edge of the void, embrace the unknowable abyss of chaos, gaze deeply in, find bliss nourishment and other treasures. And perhaps for some, to inspire others to do the same.
May you find all the dark deep spells of belief easy to dispel!